Perfection kills! It kills dreams...it kills relationships...it kills our self esteem. I should know. I have struggled with a standard of perfection for many years. Some people close to me would question that statement because I have failed to reach perfection on every level. More accurately, the quest for perfection has created a perpetual cycle of failure.
In an attempt to guarantee perfect actions and therefore perfect results, many of my plans have never gotten out of the planning stage. The search for perfect plans...perfect actions...and perfect results has caused me to procrastinate in everything from doing my taxes to making a quilt to applying for a new job or trying a new recipe. I have waited for uninterrupted hours...stress free days...and everyone to be "on board". But those conditions have never happened....nor will they. And in the past my failure to attain perfection has perpetuated that sense of failure and hindered the attempt to try again.
In recent years I have worked diligently at letting go of the attempt for perfection. My focus has shifted toward a new healthier standard. A standard that reflects what is important to me...not society or the accepted norm. I no longer feel that my acceptance as a person hinges on what kind of present I give someone...or how elaborate I decorate the birthday cake...or how many blue ribbons I receive at the county fair. I am good enough. Yes...I am good enough even when I buy a gift that stays within my budget...or when I opt to let someone else bake the cake...or when I choose not to scurry and hurry to enter exhibits in the fair.
For my sense of approval does not lie outside myself but within myself. By releasing the pursuit of perfection, I have found an inner acceptance of myself. And ironically....finding that is almost perfection!
No comments:
Post a Comment