Every few years I take inventory of my life and assess where I spend my resources of time, money, and energy. This year has become one of those years. My calendar was overbooked. My schedule was filled with too many obligations. And I had gotten caught up in trying to do everything....be everything....experience everything....attend everything. I was burning the candle at both ends and I was tired. It took a 10-day illness to make me slow down, contemplate my daily agendas, and give me the chance to reflect on what I truly want my life to look like....what I want it to feel like. I had the opportunity to ask myself how I wanted to structure my days? For the structure of my days determines the structure of my life.
|Organized tubs of projects I will never finish. They are heading|
to a donation center. (Or to my cousin Robyn! LOL)
I have a sign on my bedroom wall that states, "Take care of the minutes, and the hours and years will take care of themselves." During my illness, I saw that statement multiple times each day. I asked myself if I was truly taking care of my minutes? Do they move me closer to the person I want to become? Do they nurture me? Do they challenge me? Are they contributing to my best self? Am I navigating the minutes, and therefore navigating the years? The answer was not a resounding "No", but it certainly wasn't a strong "Yes". It became obvious that some serious "shedding" needed to occur. I needed to drop the aspects of my life that are no longer needed or that have finished their purpose.
|One of three bookcases in my house. This is the tidy one!|
And I won't show you the stacks of books that have escaped the
confines of a bookcase! ;-)
|A few pieces of my McCoy pottery collection. I am ready to select my true favorites and part with the others.|
I am wielding a sharp blade to anything and everything that doesn't fill me up or support me in the life I want. What will remain are the people, activities, and things that truly excite me.... grow me.... build me in a positive way. This round of deciduous culling has been underway for only a week, but some impactful changes have already occurred. I am falling back in love with my home. One tiny example is the renewed use of my sunroom. I love spending time in that beautiful space. But, I hadn't settled down in the upholstered chair with a book or curled up on the futon for a nap in months. It is such a peaceful spot and offers the perfect environment for creative pursuits, reading, or sorting through random thoughts (okay.... daydreaming!). How can I rationalize having such a nurturing location in my home and not spending time there? Bottom line....I can't.
The most exciting part of a deciduous life happens after the shedding is complete. Following a short period of dormancy, the tree sends forth tiny, budding leaves.... new life!! I leave for a two week trip to England in 10 days. I think that will be the ideal period of dormancy. Upon my return, I can set about bringing forth new life....MY new life. A life that is more focused and streamlined. A life that I am designing to look and feel like I want. There is power in a deciduous life!