My Deciduous Life

I am an ardent lover of words! And I have been enamored with the word "deciduous" for several years. Definitions of the word include; "falling off at maturity", "the dropping of a part that is no longer needed", or "falling away after its purpose is finished". The most common usage of the word refers to trees that shed or drop their leaves in autumn. However, I describe many things as being deciduous: habits, relationships, interests, wardrobes, and patterns of thinking.

Every few years I take inventory of my life and assess where I spend my resources of time, money, and energy. This year has become one of those years. My calendar was overbooked. My schedule was filled with too many obligations. And I had gotten caught up in trying to do everything....be everything....experience everything....attend everything. I was burning the candle at both ends and I was tired. It took a 10-day illness to make me slow down, contemplate my daily agendas, and give me the chance to reflect on what I truly want my life to look like....what I want it to feel like. I had the opportunity to ask myself how I wanted to structure my days? For the structure of my days determines the structure of my life.

Organized tubs of projects I will never finish. They are heading
to a donation center. (Or to my cousin Robyn! LOL)

I have a sign on my bedroom wall that states, "Take care of the minutes, and the hours and years will take care of themselves." During my illness, I saw that statement multiple times each day. I asked myself if I was truly taking care of my minutes? Do they move me closer to the person I want to become? Do they nurture me? Do they challenge me? Are they contributing to my best self? Am I navigating the minutes, and therefore navigating the years? The answer was not a resounding "No", but it certainly wasn't a strong "Yes". It became obvious that some serious "shedding" needed to occur. I needed to drop the aspects of my life that are no longer needed or that have finished their purpose.

One of three bookcases in my house. This is the tidy one!
And I won't show you the stacks of books that have escaped the
confines of a bookcase! ;-) 

As my health has returned, I have taken a serious look at what fills my days and I have arrived at some surprising conclusions. I am ready to shed items from which I never thought I would part. This includes unfinished projects, outgrown hobbies, time-consuming collectibles, cookware suitable for a family of four, clothes, routines, habits that don't serve me well, relationships that don't encourage my best self, and books.  Yes!!! You read that right!! This self-professed book hoarder is ready to downsize her personal library! (Whew....I feel slightly relieved as I type that.)

A few pieces of my McCoy pottery collection. I am ready to select my true favorites and part with the others.

I am wielding a sharp blade to anything and everything that doesn't fill me up or support me in the life I want. What will remain are the people, activities, and things that truly excite me.... grow me.... build me in a positive way. This round of deciduous culling has been underway for only a week, but some impactful changes have already occurred. I am falling back in love with my home. One tiny example is the renewed use of my sunroom. I love spending time in that beautiful space. But, I hadn't settled down in the upholstered chair with a book or curled up on the futon for a nap in months. It is such a peaceful spot and offers the perfect environment for creative pursuits, reading, or sorting through random thoughts (okay.... daydreaming!). How can I rationalize having such a nurturing location in my home and not spending time there? Bottom line....I can't.

The most exciting part of a deciduous life happens after the shedding is complete. Following a short period of dormancy, the tree sends forth tiny, budding leaves.... new life!!  I leave for a two week trip to England in 10 days. I think that will be the ideal period of dormancy. Upon my return, I can set about bringing forth new life....MY new life. A life that is more focused and streamlined. A life that I am designing to look and feel like I want. There is power in a deciduous life!